


Vicious Cycle

by radioactiveneon (sosoeuso)



Category: Original Work
Genre: Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-13 15:58:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18472228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sosoeuso/pseuds/radioactiveneon





	Vicious Cycle

I love them, I adore them,

I fantasize and idolize,

I hate them, despise them,

Antagonize and brutalize.

The fuller at first I fill with passion,

The stronger the hatred I have to ration.

 

But why, I wonder,

Is it that every time

I do the blunder

Of falling for grime?

Am I the one who is attracted to what cuts me,

Or am I the element who causes the curds here?

 

It hurts to see that all is platonic

That none of the feelings ever line up

But considering my bad luck that seems chronic

I wonder how badly would it blow up?

Imagine for a second how bad it would get

The self-destruction we would beget.

 

I am difficult, I do admit,

Volatile and fluctuant.

You’re problematic, hypocrite,

Childish and impetulant.

Why do I seem to have a type

For a super noxious archetype?

 

I shouldn’t believe in silly things

Like love at first sight,

But every time my heart sings

And I fly to them like moths to the light.

“In hindsight, I should have seen the warnings;”

Red flags announcing my mournings.

 

I could blame the media for selling me the idea

Of a perfect match set in heaven to me,

But I am the one who fell for this panacea,

This snake oil that would set me free.

Or is it more a medication to my own obsession,

Because my heart makes my brain question.

 

I can either have it all the way or not at all

There’s no half-loving someone

I guess no wonder I always fall

There’s only withdrawal on the long run.

I guess there are those who just fade away

But regardless, that’s just a slow decay.

 

I’ve heard that’s how it goes with everyone

“There’s no easy end for something big”

“You’re either friendzoned or got the one”

And it’s always, “How long can you maintain your rig?”

But yet I don’t see people mope and suffer

Under the hands of a jerkass bluffer.

 

Again and again, I fall for the same,

And my heart sways despite my fears.

Again and again, I fall for the game,

And I lick my wounds and cry my tears.

And I slowly corrode from inside out

Filled with hatred, bitterness and doubt.


End file.
